Verizon Unveils "iPhone Killer", Apple Shuts Down iPhone Production, Calls it Quits


Folks, I have some news that will come as terrible blow to everyone. Verizon has just introduced what it claims to be a true no shit honest to goodness iPhone killer. Yes, I know... I'm in shock myself. Now, this is no ordinary iPhone killer. No siree, Bob. Nope, this revolutionary new phone from LG, dubbed Voyager, offers a set of features not found on anything else on the market; it has an HTML web browser (yes, real HTML, not that fake HTML found on other fones phones). It plays MP3 and WMA audio. It takes photos. And steal yourselves... it even has a MicroSD slot.

But pick yourselves off the floor for just a minute, because the news gets worse. In light of today's news, Apple released a statement announcing plans to exit the handset business and shut down iPhone production, conceding the market to Verizon's amazing new Voyager phone. Here's the press release...

Team, It is with great sadness that I must inform you that Verizon has upstaged us with the release of a new clone which completely and utterly mops the floor with iPhone. Rather than suffer the humiliation of trying to compete against such a product, I believe it is in the best interest for the company to abandon the phone market, and focus all our efforts on iPods and Mac sales. We had a great run while it lasted, but LG and Verizon have simply kicked our ass. Hope to see you all at the company Christmas party. BYOB. Best, Steve

As a result of today's announcement I will be shutting this site down and starting a new blog; The Verizon iPhone Wannabe Blog. Please visit me there, and thanks for your loyal support.


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Reader comments

Verizon Unveils "iPhone Killer", Apple Shuts Down iPhone Production, Calls it Quits


Well, damn. Guess I'll just toss my iPhone in the trash, cancel my ATT contract, and hurry on over to Verizon. I mean a micro-sd slot and html!! Where has Verizon been all my life?

looks like what apple would've done with the iPhone... If they smoked as much pole as LG does. Ever used an LG handset? On wait this blog isn't frequented by teenagers who can't spend more than $12 on a handset.
Sorry Verizon... crap is what it looks like to me.

Well, I'll be sure to throw out my iPhone right away and switch to this new LG flip up phone...NOT!

I've actually used LG phones for several years now and they're great & hold up over time. Consumer Reports has ranked the LG phones up pretty high (no, they don't take money under the table to give favorable recommendations). I'm not bashing or fanboying. I'm on the fence of what I'll get when my VZW contract is up soon. I want to see news of the 2nd gen iPhone before I do anything. If you want to argue, come to and argue with others. But grow up first. Both devices have their pros & cons. Some people base their decisions on what's best for them or maybe which carrier is better in their area. Hell if I'm going to run out and buy a device on a group of carriers (GSM) that are horrible in my area and I have little faith in (friends on the GSM carriers always complain).

Hi there, can you give me the source of the statement released by Apple, as I could not find it anywhere on Apple's site.

holy crap!?! really? i hope so at&t and apple screwed me throught the ass with the iphone which is why i switch back to my old network and got the voyager( its way better,cheaper,and verizon has the best network ever!!!!!!)

Seriously, that is about the UGLIEST iPhone clone out there. Why get a clone, when you can get an iPhone! LOL at everyone who actually believed Steve Jobs said that. To those that hate on Apple and the iPhone, no other phone has been cloned as much as this one, so obviously they did something right.

This is obviously untrue but for anyone who thinks that the Voyager is a clone or copy of the iPhone, you are DEAD WRONG! LG was first to introduce the touch phone with their "Prada" which was not released in the U.S.A, curious how Apple's design looks VERY similar to their Prada. I am an Apple lover but I HATE at&t and WILL not give in to their Monopoly of the iPhone so don't insult LG or Verizon because it has a MUCH better network than at&t will ever have. All at&t does is falsely advertise itself as the best network so you get roped into a contract...don't fall for it!! At least Verizon doesn't have to resort to personal attacks on other companies in their ads to win over customers. Anyway, it feels good to get this off my chest thanks for reading.

i dont care if the voyager is better than the iphone in the "factory/stock" setting but that shit dont compare to a jailbroken iphone homie jailbroken iphone's kick any other phone's ass for sure!

First off, I have the Verizon LG Voyager and I enjoy its versatility and it's features. Granted, it isn't like the iPhone however it is not meant to replicate or kill it at all. I looked into getting the iPhone however I heard from many people that once the "coolness" and "wow" factor wore off, the 'clear and present'(lol) problems begin to unfold: the iPhone has a very poor signal quality, especially where I live in CT, AT&T sucks and is an evil corporation, the cost of iPhone isn't worth the look, it has no GPS, cannot take videos, the battery cannot be removed which is one of the biggest headaches especially if it becomes faulty, no songs can be set as ringtones(which is one of the coolest features to have on a phone), no games, and it gets wicked hot.
The LG Voyager has an external touch screen with an internal screen attached with a full QWERTY keyboard.
Just read the website that is attached and see what they have to say.

This entire fight would never have existed if Verizon just took Apple's offer, lolol.

This is the worst website I have ever seen. It is a total rip off of any real website associated with the IPHONE.
The editorial content is for a 5 year old.

The article at least tries to be funny/cyncial/satiric...
But your comment is just plain lame.
Get a life!

wow... i had started up on a verizon plan with the voyager. it sucked. the touchscreen was horrible and really good for nothing except dialing calls. i found myself using the inside 90% of the time. while i loved the keyboard for txting i brought it back. i got an lg dare. its great and really much better than the voyager. i thought the keyboard would be problematic but its great.